Ask the Readers: Talking about Money?

Throughout my life, my parents always talked about money.  How much this cost, why that was so expensive, how to save money here and there.  So I guess I've grown accustomed to hearing money in conversations. 

Now that I'm all grown up and living away from my family, I'm finding that I can't have the same conversations about money with the people around me. 

Sure I can talk to my wife about our spending habits and long term goals.  But when it comes to investment and wealth building strategies, I'm on my own. 

That's probably why I like blogging about money so much.  I guess to express the money related thoughts running through my head most of the day.  Also because I can't talk about this stuff to my friends without them being extremely uncomfortable.

Unfortunately, around these parts, there are no investment clubs or anything similar.  The pf blog world and the readers are my investment club.

So why is talking about sex, politics, religion, crime, gossip so easy, but talking about money so difficult to some people?

Photo credit: emdot

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FT

FT is the founder and editor of Million Dollar Journey (est. 2006). Through various financial strategies outlined on this site, he grew his net worth from $200,000 in 2006 to $1,000,000 by 2014. You can read more about him here.
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NotEasilytricked
10 years ago

I would like to suggest another view about difficulty in financial discussions. In my case, I have no interest in revealing my own financial standing, salary, etc. to family, friends – whoever, as I have observed that people feel entitled to my help if they discover I earn more money than they do. They neglect to take into account that I have worked hard my whole ife, saved money and made sacrifices. Often they have been impulsive with their own money, and haven’t taken care of their own future or set aside money for emergencies. Requests for aid from others usually arrive in the form of ‘an immediate crisis’ – savy people understand that this technique is designed to cause instant action without time for thought as to alternative solutions . . .

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Gates VP
13 years ago

Guerrilla Investor, quoted for truth:
Perhaps the best approach for each individual is as unique as the individual him/herself

In fact, I’m going to go one step further and replace Perhaps with most definitely!

Money is very taboo in North American culture. But I think the root cause is that money is the manifestation of a person’s life decisions. Money is just a physical representation of time. When we trade dollar bills or gold bars or just numbers in a ledger, we are fundamentally trading time.

Now what you do (or don’t do) with your money speaks fundamentally about who you are. And speaking candidly about these decisions is very scary to most people.

I think there are two reasons for this:
1. People are not commonly “active” decision makers. Even the “active” ones have their moments of weakness.
2. Certain people like to make up for this lack by providing judgments and opinions on other people’s decision.

The tale of your chequebook is very closely tied to the tale of your life. Sharing this information with people is tantamount to sharing intimate pieces of your life’s story. People fear (very deeply) the judgments of others with respect to this information.

Of course, this is just my opinion, YMMV.

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Dividends4Life
13 years ago

> I’m finding that I can’t have the same conversations about
> money with the people around me.
> Sure I can talk to my wife about our spending habits and
> long term goals. But when it comes to investment and
> wealth building strategies, I’m on my own.

Wow! I can really relate to this. Not only am I on my own, but I am the bad guy in our family. The unstated message is “Everyone else is living beyond their means and having a great time. Why are you so worried about our financial future?”

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I plan to include your article in my weekly carnival review this Friday.

Best Wishes,
D4L

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